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Sunday, 16 November 2014

Live to Achieve; Live to Escape

Between Ying and Yang, between Good and Bad, and between Right and Wrong, there's a thin line that divides the 2 halves.

The trouble is finding it to know where you are standing....

Live to Escape

The usual tell is after having an experience, we don't want to experience it again.

A childhood of lack.

A broken family. 

A failed relationship.

Career going no where.

Disgruntled with how much you are earning.

And so on.

The journey to escape involves acquiring more.

More is needed to fill the hole in your heart.

Live to Achieve

The usual tell is after having an experience, we want to experience more of it again!

Being there when your child spoke his first word, took his first step.

Family dinners.

Holding her hand for the first time.

Enjoying the greater responsibility at work.

Having the means to help a stranger in need.

You fill in the rest.

The journey to achieve surprisingly may involve "letting go"...

Putting your own career on hold to be a stay-at-home dad to support your wife's dream.

Getting a big pay-cut to do something you love so you can whistle to work everyday.

Forgoing that promotion so you can have more time for family dinners.

Taking on pro bono work or volunteering your time for a cause you believe in.

Less is needed when you are feeling good.


  1. SMOL,

    Most of us mortal, simply fudge between the 2 sides and trying as much as possible the find the "middle ground"

    It's on that momentarily thought or feel, that sometime determine heaven or hell( extreme )

    The hole in the heart, could make everything seem so godsend now. So happy with the little indulgences.

    The achieving heart could set himself up for disappointment again and again.

    I saw this:

    Happiness = reality - expectation

    1. Sillyinvestor,

      Nothing is good or bad; thinking makes it so.

      I would say the achieving heart (Eastern philosophy context) may offer less for disappointment as we are "letting go" of expectations... We do what we really like, love, prefer, etc.

      The escaping heart is the one filled with expectations.

      (The word "achieve" is used as a "decoy" or "shock" o shake the reader out from straight line extrapolation)

  2. Hi SMOL,

    Ying and Yang….suddenly reminds me of Yang Yin the evil tour guide. Ok….pardon my childishness and complete irrelevance.

    Talking about letting go, I remembered a story of Monk and Nun, mentioned in the TVB serial 大时代.

    The Monk and Nun were chase by bandits to a river bank. Desperate for lives, the Monk piggyback the Nun across the river and save her lives. When they reach the other side of the river, the Monk put down the Nun and they manage to run away from the bandits. Instead of thankful to the Monk for saving her life, the Nun is so angry because Nun is not supposed to have intimate contact with Man let alone a Monk. The Nun scolded the Monk and grumbled. The Monk said “我都把你放下了,你为什么放不下!- meaning “I already let go of you, Why can’t you let go!”

    By the way, maybe I prefer Live to Leisure….just like SMOL. Hahaha… I prefer Live to Achieve!


    1. Too much Leisure. Man can you tahan?

    2. Rolf,

      Yup, many live in the past. We may know such people in our lives - always living in past glories or retelling past hurt...

      Quite a few also live in the future under the guise or delusion of planning for a better future. If I this... I will that...

      Now? No action.

      Don't disturb me! I am planning!

    3. CW,

      Yes. All things have a balance.

      To you is work; to me is leisure.

      I want to jump in; you want to escape out (reminds me of marriage, lol!)

      Just ask those 60 plus entrepreneurs who are still loving every minute of their 12 hours work day.

      I often wonder, those monks who do nothing but meditate, are they "working"?

      How about those tais tais? Do they ever complain of too much leisure?

      If you don't like work, you don't like work.

      If we like work, there's no retirement! Hence no need to plan for retirement?

    4. Hi CW,
      Too much leisure can tahan. Too much sex buay tahan! Can you tahan? Haha

      Hi SMOL,
      I know what you planning for now after you tell B. But no action! Haha

    5. Rolf,

      I am not celibate; and I don't kiss and tell ;)

  3. Hi SMOL

    Too much is too little. Too little is too leisure. Too leisure is too much.

    What does a man want?

    1. Mr. Freud would agree very much with you!

    2. ckw-I99,

      You think why men have a thing for big luxurious cars and fast speedy sports cars?

      It's to peacock to the opposite sex they have crazy resources to throw around. Definitely not men of lack.

      And to frighten off would be male challenges - my one bigger!


  4. SMOL sir,

    If don't have it yet, how to let go? I find that many things in life is beyond our control - thus, it must be 'given' first, then you can choose to let go or acquire it. So how can we mortals make the giving happen?

    1. ckw-I99,

      Please don't sir me. Wait sniper shoot me!

      Hence we seek to "escape" by acquiring things and experiences (drugs, alcohol, gambling, speed driving, etc) to fill whatever we perceive as lack.

      Some through self-discovery, some through spirituality, and some by pure dumb luck, we may come to the realisation the more we "let go" (spiritual people say I submit myself to thy will; another way of saying I letting go of ego), the less baggage or chip on the shoulder we carry, the happier our journey.

      For some people, don't need to "let go"; just move to another spot will do:


  5. "For some people, don't need to "let go"; just move to another spot will do:"
    i beg your pardon. If you don't "let go", you will explode. It's a matter of time only.

    1. temperament,

      Of course they will!

      But for some, we have to start with the basics.

      Moving to another spot is a lot "eaiser" than "letting go"...


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