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Sunday, 17 June 2012

Cannot Compartmentalize Your Personal Life


In my previous blog post, I’ve written about it can be a good idea to compartmentalize (or ring-fenced) our different investment/trading accounts.

But today, I am reminding myself that in our personal lives, there’s no such thing as breaking it into neat “compartments”. 

It’s also an expansion of this old post of mine: What 5-balls? 

We are one holistic us. One big ball; not multiple balls.


Public and private lives

We may assume how we live our private lives don’t matter to our public personas.

Like having multiple relationships with members of the opposite sex, our dalliance with paid sex, acting out our fantasies behind closed doors.

In some societies, if these private “secrets” are exposed, they are merely greeted with a smile and a wink. Naughty, naughty.

But over here, you get pilloried

I can’t help but draw comparisons with Teflon Bill Clinton and ex-HP CEO Mark Hurd.

Guess Singaporeans need to be world-class in everything. We must be seen to be holier than thou too.

So unless we become more “liberalised” (youth, I am counting on you now), we have to assume we have to be saints also in our private lives when we apply for a job – never mind  if it’s not expressly stated in our job contracts.


Cyberspace personas

It’s also interesting some people found it the hard way that you can’t compartmentalise or separate what we say or do in cyberspace from our real lives.

You found out soon enough that your rants to what you thought were a closed circle of friends is not so “private” if one idiot of your “friend” decides to “share” it along to their other “friends”.

Unless if you are a hacker who can cover your on-line trails, even if you hide under anonymous nick, if you defame, libel, or spread false truths that result in violence or losses to others, rest assured if the determined “other party” wants to find you, they will.

The best policy is to say or do in cyberspace like what we would do in our real lives. 
 

12 comments:

  1. Amen brother. Now what the f*** did I say again in the office the other day? ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  2. I just keep everything private... including my privates.

    ;p

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Another naughty boy!

      To use a pseudonym for privacy like a writer is perfectly OK.

      But if we want to engage in political commentary or giving critique to others, then the honourable thing is to flip our visor to show our faces like knights do before battle (hence the salute).

      Imagine doing jousting with a brown paper bag over our heads...

      LOL!

      OK, they cannot be knights. They are more like assassins who throw darts behind one's back.

      Delete
    2. Political commentary or critique? Aiyoh.. Too cerebral for me. I am a lazy guy.

      Also, I am afraid of getting cataracts from the glaring sun. I prefer my visor (with polarised lens and UV protection) down, thank you. ;p

      Delete
    3. Hey AK71 knows his optical science well :-) UV protection will definitely help with the cataracts. Dunno about the polarizers though. Have to think about it. ;-)

      Delete
    4. Polarizer lens are great to minimize the reflections and glare while driving so you can ogle at hot babes along the sidewalks.

      And on hot sunny cloudless days, man! The sky is oh so blue!

      The waves are calling me...

      Delete
    5. Hi Ronian,

      I got A1 in "O" Levels Biology one leh but I learned about cataracts from my optometrist. ;p

      SMOL is right about polarised lens reducing glare. This is so that I can see traffic more clearly and drive more safely. I don't look at sidewalks one...

      Delete
    6. Yeah right... Sure you do ;)

      And I thought man's fascination with cars has more to do with peacocking...

      LOL!

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    7. My journey with cars, iirc: Nissan Sunny - Mazda 626 - BMW520 - Mazda 6 - Mazda 2... it is like a bell curve lor... Now, I am more practical. Car is transportation. Peacocks stay in the Jurong Bird Park. Hahahaha.. ;p

      Delete
    8. To use a pseudonym for privacy like a writer is perfectly OK.

      But if we want to engage in political commentary or giving critique to others, then the honourable thing is to flip our visor to show our faces like knights do before battle (hence the salute).


      Hi Jared,

      There are bloggers who want to preserve their online privacy precisely because they make political commentaries. In that sense, these bloggers are not as honorable as bloggers like you who reveal their real names on the net. However, given what happened to past opposition figures, you cannot blame these bloggers for not revealing their true identity. As long as these anonymous bloggers keep to the facts when making sensitive political comments, I think even the ruling PAP party can benefit from reading them. The civil service may not provide a good feedback mechanism to their political masters particularly when it comes to bad news that are jarring to the ears. The messenger might be unfairly punished!

      The Singaporean Mind is an example of such a high quality blog. I think Singaporean politicians should read it.

      Delete
    9. hyom,

      I hear what you say.

      Politics is not meant for "small people" who throw darts outside the political arena.

      Chiam See Tong and Low Thia Kiang never got sued for defamation; and I'm sure they have won the respect of PAP and other opposition parties alike despite being not in agreement all the time.

      Just as long we speak the truth and can back what we say with facts when challenged, what's there to be afraid?

      There is rule of law in Singapore. Our Singapore judiciary is highly regarded in the world.

      Let's take ourselves personally.

      Imagine if someone makes an allegation about you towards top management. Disparaging about your lack of competence; or suggesting you hands are not clean; or insinuating you are harassing your female colleague.

      Would you want your top management to make investigations about you based on an anonymous person?

      Or would you rather top management ONLY respond to a named person that they can interview and you can vigorously respond with your side of the story?

      No matter how brilliant, no thinking man would follow anyone who wears a brown paper bag on his head.

      Someone actually turned up at Occupy Raffles Place following a faceless young organiser who chickened-out. LOL!

      I salute the Hougang Worker Party supporters who openly declare their support on TV and in the press.

      And respect for those who are willing to stand as Opposition candidates in our elections.

      I guess the Opposition needs more supporters who don't wear brown paper bags and support them in real life too; not just in cyber-space ;)

      Delete

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